Full Circle Intervention

We are Happy to be bringing her home! Bosie State has been an amazing experience and we so proud of you Savannah! You excelled in school and somehow, even during the pandemic, made incredible friends with some truly exceptional young women. I’m not sure where you and your brother came from, but I am keenly aware of how blessed I am to be your mom. Sober and shameless, kw #bosiestate #bosiestatebroncos #bosiestateuniversity #cominghome #freshmanyearofcollege #motheranddaughter #soberaf #sobermom #sobermomtribe #sobermoms

My heart is full#bosiestate #bosiestatebroncos #freshmenyearisover #bosiestateuniversity #college #motheranddaughter #cominghome #soberlife #sober #sobermom #sobermomtribe #sobermomlife #sobermoms

On my way to pick up @savannahwandzilak from Bosie state. Bringing her home for summer. Someone asked what I’m watching on Netflix and I’m proud to say Gilmore Girls....yep. Almost 50 and watching GG....sober and shameless...#gilmoregirls #soberlife #sober #goingtogetmydaughter

I spend a lot of time talking about the last day. The day of hitting bottom but Lately I’ve been reflecting on the first day. The fateful day, alcohol change the course of my life. As long as I can remember, I felt see-through, Like a jellyfish, and the whole world could look straight through me. I felt too much, as if I had no filter or protection against the pain of others. I absorbed emotion, and saw things that others did not. I saw the injustice and the cruelty in t...he world. The playground felt like a war zone that I had to learn to navigate. I had an endless well of unexplained emotion and I felt an existential angst. I felt uncomfortable in my skin and driven mad with a feeling inside that I was meant for something more. I could not name, for what I was starving, but I felt hungry, every moment I was awake. I felt miss placed. Misunderstood. And because of this, I was terribly shy and insecure not being able to find my footing in my 13 year old world. The first night I drank I felt ease. I felt quite inside for the first time ever. The burning heat of painful raw emotional awareness extinguished. I felt relief from my severe sensitivity. What began that night was a love affair that took me a step away from the grave. It took years to arrive at my last day. Homeless and Hopelessly addicted, I no longer felt see-through. I had successfully filled myself with shame, as if concrete ran through my veins. I No longer vibrated with sensitivity. I was shattered into a million pieces held only together but my skin. It was the last day that pushed me into the rooms of recovery. Like molasses I oozed into an empty seat and began my fight for sobriety. But it has been healing the pain of the first day, that I have found lasting and bittersweet recovery. Learning to love myself has become my freedom song. I did not get sober to get things, I got sober for freedom. Freedom to love myself fearlessly, to use my experience to benefit others and the freedom to wake up each day, walk into my life and try to heal my small corner of the world. Healing the first day and been my path home. Sober snd shameless, kw #sober #soberaf #recoveryjourney #soberandshameless See more

Happy belated Easter. It felt so good to be together with friends and family. It has been 18 months since we have all been together. My heart was so joy filled. I hope you had a restful happy day with those you hold near and dear. onward and upward! Sober and shameless, kw #fcovid #onwardandupward #sober #soberliving #soberaf #happyeaster

And he’s home.....when did these kind of days become ‘just a visit?’ Sober, shameless and happy, kw #motherandson #homefromcollege #son #sobermom #sobermomtribe #sobermoms #hegrewup #soberandshameless

I am Not sure what I have done in this life, or others past, to deserve these two, but I am grateful and blessed. Most days, since the day they were born, I have felt desperately inadequate as a parent. The First days of Kindergarten to high school graduations, friends, play dates to dances, the first loves to the first broken hearts, snuggly PJ’s to prom dresses and tuxedos, big wheels to mountain bikes, questions of the sun and moon to loss grief and suicide. Questions comi...ng, my head spinning, answers failing but faith always leading. In the quite moments, I wonder if I did enough? Did I love enough, did I pay attention enough to art projects and noodle necklaces, did I go to enough baseball games and back to school nights, did we have enough family dinners and did I do enough to mend them when their hearts shattered, that fateful day, 8 years ago. As I stand and wave good bye, leaving them in their dorm rooms, in places near and far, I can only pray that the roots I planted are deep enough to hold strong and keep them grounded and the wings I grew, are wide enough to carry them into the endless possibilities of their bright futures. Saying goodbye, With shaking hands, stinging tears, my heart pounding and a lump in my throat so large I’m sure they can see it, I turn away and I release. Sober and shameless, kw #sober #sobriety #soberliving #livingsober #soberparenting #soberaf #sobermom #sobermomtribe #motherhood #motherandchildren #offtocollege #soberandshameless See more

Today, I celebrated 27 years clean and sober. I close this day, with deep gratitude for my life, my amazing husband, children, dear friends and family. I can not go to bed without thanking all of my ‘fellows’ who, on the first day, bloody and beaten by addiction, stood with me on the spirtual battleground of my early recovery. Fighting alongside me, as I went to war with myself and the shame, that nearly burned me alive. Believing in me, when no one else did, as I slowly bega...n to rise from the ashes and took flight, into the wide open world of possibilities. You have seen me through the darkest days, celebrated my brightest days and loved me into a life where I stand, sober and shameless. As I lay my head on my pillow tonight, and reflect back, I am filled with radical love for all those who kept the fire burning, welcomed me into the rooms and showed me the way to a new and wonderful life. #27yearscleanandsober #27yearssober #addiction #recovery #recoveryispossible #nevergiveup #itsnevertoolate #sober #soberlife #sobriety #soberliving #recoveryjourney #livingmybestlife #soberandshameless See more

From Start to finish in 10 minutes flat. #youth #daughters #daughterlove #naturalbeauty #nofliter #nofilterneeded @ Boise, Idaho

I was having a very overwhelming morning. Sometimes, I feel pulled in many different directions, doing my very best to show up for all those in need, all the while, getting out the door, dropping my car off at the shop, and just handling life and all the Monday morning madness. Running late, rushing into my office, I sat at my desk and found a sweet note from my daughter. Wise beyond her years, her words were a simple reminder of the ‘recovery’ way of life...one thing at a time. And just like that, at 9am, my morning, began again. Sober and shameless, kw #sober #soberlife #soberliving #soberaf #mybeauitfulgirl #raisingdaughters #raisingchilderninrecovery #family #recoverylife #recoverylife #soberandshameless