South Bay Nurtured Mamas

Happy Sunday, mamas! Make sure to take a moment to remind yourself that you are doing an amazing job!

Self-care is the active effort of planning an activity that fulfills and re-energizes you; It shouldn’t be energy draining or stressing you out. It sounds simple, so why do so many mamas (people) struggle with self-care? Some mamas may become overwhelmed just with the thought of adding another thing to do in their already chaotic schedules. Other mamas may think it’s selfish or it’s time taken away from their little. Regardless, EVERYONE benefits from self-care; more spec...ifically, you and your baby will both feel the difference! There are so many self-care activities out there and it’s all about what works for YOU. The only way to tell what works for you is to do become mindful of your experience during and after the activity. The trick is finding your self-care activities and realistically scheduling them into your week. Here are some examples of practicing self-care to help you get started: * Eating AND sleeping healthy * Wearing comfortable clothing that make you feel good about yourself * Drinking water * Excercising - walking, swimming, etc. * Taking a mental health day! AKA mama’s day off * Learning new things * DIY projects * Going on vacations or day trips * Spending time with people you love * Engaging in stimulating conversations * Asking for help when you need it * Being outside and admiring nature * Meditating (Headspace and Calm are free apps) * Organizing/Cleaning * Reading * Journaling * Saying no to things you don’t want to do * Setting healthy boundaries * Balancing work/life/family/me time You may find that you’re already doing a few of these, which is a good start! The next time you’re doing something for yourself, set your intentions on practicing self-care and nurturing yourself.

Sometimes it’s hard to not feel rejected by your little. You’ve tried all the soothing techniques you know of and your child continues to tantrum, leaving you feeling defeated. It’s important to remind yourself that we ALL have bad days, mamas and babies. Some days, we (adults) wake up on the wrong side of the bed; this is the same for children.... However, the main difference being that adults can verbalize having a bad day and have the capacity to self-regulate Children don’t. Littles don’t understand what having a bad day means, they just don’t like this feeling in their body, causing tantrums. Hopefully this insight helps reframe kids’ frustrating behaviors. When a mama can empathize, relate, and understand her child’s behaviors, her natural mama instincts will kick into overdrive! Photo: @lyndseyyo

I like to reference being on a plane; the flight attendants are reviewing what to do in the event that pressure changes and oxygen masks fall down. If you have a child with you, who do they say to put the oxygen mask on first? If you answered yourself, first, and then your child, you answered correctly. ... A mama can’t take care of her child if she’s not able to breathe. This is an extreme example, but very relatable to maternal self-care and parenting. If you’re not taking care of yourself, that indirectly, and unintentionally, affects your little. To begin this process, try to find the little things during your normal day that bring you joy (ie: walking outside, people watching, drinking your favorite tea, etc.).

A mama’s attachment to a baby begins during her pregnancy and continues to develop after birth. Unfortunately, this is not easy for those who have experienced past traumas (ie: her own childhood traumas, loss, unresolved conflicts with parents/family, etc.). If you have experienced any hardships, it can serve as a major barrier to attaching with your little; not to mention it can make this process feel like a burden and be extremely triggering. Although this is difficult ev...ents to revisit, the potential outcomes are worth the work. Once a mama processes her past traumas, she is more likely to develop a secure attachment with her little. If you, or someone you know, has a difficult time attaching to their baby, please visit my site for resources and/or contact information for services (link in bio). Photo: @lovedaphnemae

Many mamas struggle with the balance of managing their little’s behaviors, while remaining nurturing and meeting your child’s emotional needs. That’s when behavior management AND reading your child’s cues come into play; In other words any unwanted behaviors are ignored, while modeling and praising the desired behaviors. But how much is too much for your little? Reading your child’s emotional cues is key with this process, but can be the most challenging to balance. Childre...n require a calm, relaxed state of mind to learn and grow, which means a tantruming child isn’t learning what to do. When your little begins to show signs of distress, provide physical comfort and soothing strategies to help regulate your his/her emotions. It’s crucial to minimize the talking and wait to explain yourself until he/she is completely calm. This way you will begin to balance meeting your child’s emotional needs and still managing behaviors. If you have any additional questions, please feel free to ask! Shout out to @pediatric_behavior_consult for this quote!

Being a mama is challenging. Although many people like to show their happy faces and loving bond with their little in pictures, this rarely is an accurate picture of motherhood. It’s okay to have a bad day, but it doesn’t mean you’re a bad mama. Be kind to yourself and trust that you got this. If you’d like additional support or resources, please visit my website (link in bio).

Self-love is (yes- so overrated) necessary to love others and your little. For many, this is an awkward thought to think about and definitely not something that’s being practiced in everyday life. If this is uncomfortable, I like to reference the fake it till you make it (and believe it) quote. Start off by saying I love myself because... (ie: I am caring, I am forgiving, I am a mama, etc.) and continue to say this affirmation until you believe it AND feel it. Once you ...begin to practice positive affirmations, you will naturally begin to whole-heartedly love your little, and most importantly, yourself. #mom #momlife #mommy #mentalhealth #perinatalmentalhealth #maternalmentalhealth #therapy #nurturedmamas #southbay #southbaymommies #torrance #busymama #tiredmom #stayathomemom #momneedsabreak #momprobs #southbaymomlife #southbaymoms #mamalife #mymamahood #mynameismama #lifeasamama #monday #mondaymotivation

For this child, I have prayed. Many mamas struggle with infertility. Although October is known to be pregnancy and infant loss awareness month, I’d like to also address the mamas struggling with infertility. Infertility is another form of loss, which takes time to grieve. Every mama’s loss, is a loss to bring awareness to. Photo by: @lentillephotography

Perfection is over-rated. A perfect mama is not realistic nor is it needed for your little to thrive. Babies don’t need you to be perfect, they need you to be happy. A happy mama will be less anxious and confident with her parenting decisions. A confident mama is unstoppable and will not let society pressure her into thinking anything less of herself or her role as a mama. Mamas, make sure to find things that make you happy because it WILL positively affect you and your little.

Happy Saturday, mamas! Today, try to get outside and soak up some vitamin d. Sometimes when you’re feeling so drained and/or suffocated, changing up the environment and getting some fresh air can help you BREATHE. The sun has so many benefits, including boosting your mood. If going for a walk seems too overwhelming, try sitting outside of your home for just 5-10 minutes. Direct your attention to your breathing and try this quick grounding technique by...... * Finding 5 things you can see * Listening for 4 things you hear * Touch 3 things around you * 2 things you can smell * And 1 thing you can taste - I hope this helps you get through your day and many more to come! You spend all of your last energy on your little, but it’s time to nurish YOU, mama. Photo: @lovedaphnemae See more

Mamas, if your little is down and you have a comfy, clean bed...would you be able to sleep? If you answered no, this may be an indication of PMADS. To screen yourself for mental health symptoms, visit my Resource page on the website (link in bio). Photo: @lovedaphnemae

Your first pregnancy was a breeze and parenting felt natural. Your little is thriving, so naturally, you felt confident about expanding your family. Flash forward with your new baby, you’re now feeling irritable, anxious, unsupported, and alone. Unfortunately, people often fail to discuss the struggles of parenting more than one little. No one considers how challenging it is to share your attention between the two. No one talks about managing an extra needy toddler that’s tan...truming and waking the baby that just went down for a nap. The real truth is that there are positives and negatives to expanding your family, as with anything in life. For some mamas, it’s hard to see the positives when they feel like they’re drowning in diapers, feedings, and spit up. Fortunately, there is hope. As you juggle mama-hood and nurturing your littles, it’s important to remember to nurture yourself. With the right help, you can get better and enjoy motherhood. Photo: Nurture Photography