ACT For Today: Affiliation of Catholic Therapists

LIFE IS NOT LINEAR, though we mark it with the illusion of time. Life is not circular, though our desire to return is strong. Life simply exists in the moment where the past and the future live in the present. We are created in a nexus that binds us one to another and each of us to God. When we are mindful of the present moment, mindful of our connectedness to each other, and mindful of God's presence, it is then we find peace. How can we become mindful? We can do this by ...taking time, time to reflect and not merely react to life, time to be still and be aware of the goodness of life, time to heal the wounds of the past that afflict the present, time to create reasonable positive core beliefs about life that result in peace. In psychotherapy it is a practice of mindfulness meditation and CBT. In spirituality it is a practice of Contemplative Centering Prayer. Here is a website of FREE meditations you can use: http://franticworld.com/free-meditations-from-mindfulness/

Um re-post para mess amigos e familia em Portugal: A re-post for my friends and family in Portugal: Eu não quero ser abençoado, quero ser afortunado!... Ultimamente, tenho sido refletindo sobre ser abençoada e ser afortunado. Eles não são a mesma coisa. Um é aleatória e o outro de Deus. Vivemos em uma terra de grande riqueza e prosperidade, e a grande maioria de nós vive em algum grau de conforto. No entanto, a maioria de nós não pretendem ser rico. Há sempre alguém à frente de nós na linha de riqueza. Não olhe para trás, embora. Você vai encontrar uma enorme linha global da pobreza. Estamos na cabeça da linha, nem sequer o meio! Estou abençoado de estar à cabeça da linha? Isso significa que Deus tem favorecido a mim de alguma forma? Evidentemente, isso significaria que todos aqueles atrás de mim não tenham sido favorecida como tenho sido. Por que razão? Estou simplesmente a afortunado de estar na cabeça da linha? Isso significaria que a vida é simplesmente aleatório. É apenas o de sorte. A maioria de nós já ganhou o lotto quando consideramos a toda a humanidade. Vamos festa! Se eu tenho muita sorte, então eu posso sentar e desfrutar. Mas se estou abençoado, então estou chamados! Eu não acredito o prosperidade evangelho que prega a sua riqueza é um sinal de favor de Deus, assim construir maior! Creio no evangelho da vocação. O evangelho diz que somos chamados a algo maior na vida. Isto acarreta profunda responsabilidade. O Santo Padre Francisco fez esta a marca da sua liderança na Igreja Católica. Quando somos felizes, como o recente vencedor Powerball exclamou, não estamos a liberdade dada, mas a responsabilidade. Isso me causa grande consternação. Eu não sei que eu vivo até que a responsabilidade. Penso eu cair muito curto do que às vezes, talvez o tempo todo. Você? É muito mais fácil de ser afotunado, a abençoada. Muito mau para mim. Obrigado deus para seu muitas bênçãos. Agora me ajudar, nós, encontrar uma forma de viver até a responsabilidade que têm dado.

I DON’T WANT TO BE BLESSED, I WANT TO BE FORTUNATE! Lately, I have been reflecting on being blessed and being fortunate. They are not the same. One is random, the other from God. We live in a land of great wealth and prosperity, and the vast majority of us live in some degree of comfort. Yet, most of us would not claim to be wealthy. There is always someone up ahead of us in the line of wealth. Don’t look behind you, though. You will find an enormous global line of po...verty. We are at the head of the line, not even the middle! Am I blessed to be at the head of the line? Does that mean that God has favored me in some way? Of course, that would mean that all those behind me have not been favored as I have been. Why? Am I merely fortunate to be at the head of the line? That would mean that life is simply random. It’s just the luck of the draw. Most of us have won the lotto when we consider the whole of humanity. Cool! Let’s party! If I am fortunate, then I can sit back and enjoy. But if I am blessed, then I am called! I do not believe in the so-called prosperity gospel that preaches your wealth is a sign of God’s favor, so build it bigger! I believe in the gospel of calling. The gospel that says we are called to something greater in life. This carries profound responsibility. Pope Francis has made this the hallmark of his leadership in the Catholic Church. When we are blessed, as the recent Powerball winner exclaimed, we are not given freedom, but responsibility. This causes me great consternation. I don’t know that I live up to that responsibility. I think I fall very short of it at times, maybe all the time. Do you? It’s a lot easier to be fortunate, than blessed. Too bad for me. Thank you God for your many blessings. Now help me, us, find a way to live up to the responsibility you have given.

BONDING WITH YOUR NEWBORN A good friend and colleague, Vera A. recently posted a video regarding paid leave for parents of newborn babies. It reminded me of the vital importance of attachment for healthy emotional well-being and development. The research continues to mount in support of mother-child bonding time and the growing in support of father-child bonding as well. Indeed the evidence is mounting that violence in individuals may, at least in part, be attributed to the lack of bonding in infancy. Here is a great article for anyone who cares about the health of our children and our society with great ideas to help new parents: http://www.attachmentparenting.org/support/articles/bonding

FRIENDSHIP is so vital to our everyday living. Those intimate relationships that offer love and support in times of distress and companionship to share the joys play such a great part of our well-being. Here are two of my very best. Kathleen (clearly #1), the love of my life and Tony Flores, my 'brother from another mother" as he likes to say. Today is Tony's Birthday. If you count the worth of a man by the number of friendships he holds dear, Tony's worth is beyond measure. Thank you, Tony for your wonderful friendship over these many years. Your love and support have been precious. OK, your turn: Share with everyone a thought on friendship or name someone who has been special in your life as a friend - it's healthy for your heart and soul!

Holding On and Letting Go A number of years ago I ran anger management groups for domestic violence offenders. "I know I've got to stop holding on to my anger, ...but how do I let go?" was the common question. I must admit I didn't have much of a response. There was a man in his forties who most often sat quietly in the corner and didn't usually say much. One evening he finally spoke up, "I just got tired, so I let it all go." There is a profound wisdom in that very simple statement. We hold on to our fear, anxiety, anger, hurt, sadness. We expend so much energy in possessing these burdens. In the beginning they protect us from more harm and that is sometimes necessary, but often the holding on simply weighs us down and keeps us from moving forward. Pope Francis in the opening to a Jubilee Year of Mercy said, "We have to put mercy before judgment." At some point we must learn to forgive, have mercy, seek understanding and simply be tired enough of holding on to let go.

Antidote to Fear and Anxiety: Love - love of God, Self, and others, Also Reason - objective, reasonable, and rational thought. Why is this so hard? Possibly because love and reason are so often under attack. They are attacked in our past and in our present, in our personal lives, in the world around us and in the world so far away. We feel threatened, so we fear the present and are anxious about the future. How do we apply the antidote? Begin by taking a positive look ...for all that you can be grateful for, beginning within yourself, then moving outward to God and others. IT'S GOOD THERAPY! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GYCPsPBMo8U

Gratitude and Well Being All great spiritual traditions of the world teach gratitude, a posture in life that gives us pause to be humble and appreciate that we do not earn life, it is a gift. In my own Catholic faith there is an ancient history of grateful meditation, prayer that places us in this posture. The Trappist monk, Thomas Keating has a wonderful audio that is so insightful and guides one through a journey of grateful discovery in Centering Prayer called Contemplat...ive Prayer available though audible.com In science, we are learning what the ancients have known for millennia: gratitude has a powerful healing effect on our emotional life and a positive influence on our thinking and mindful meditation can be an instrumental tool. I recommend this book to many of my clients: Mindfulness Meditation: An Eight Week Program For Finding Peace In A Frantic World, by Mark Williams and Danny Penman of Oxford University The TED talk below is a stunning visual by Louie Schwartzberg and accompanied by the wisdom of benedictine monk, Bro. David Steindl-Rast. BE GRATEFUL! God Bless us and lead us to peace in our world! Happy Thanksgiving! http://www.ted.com//louie_schwartzberg_nature_beauty_grati

PARENTS OF YOUNG CHILDREN and PARENTS TO BE: My cousin, Anna, posted this recently and I believe it is worth repeating. http://to.pbs.org/1WLAGbJ

DON'T WORRY, BE HAPPY! Remember this song by Bobby McFerrin? Watch this 3 minute video and read the brief article about music, the brain, and the power of our expectations: VERY COOL http://blog.brainhq.com//bobby-mcferrins-amazing-musical-/

Yesterday in speaking with my brother, Armond, about Facebook video posts we agreed that anything over 5 minutes was too long for many people to engage, that most people come to Facebook for something quick and positive...not a bad thing. BUT, here is a 16:37 TED talk by Jimmy Carter (one of my personal heroes and someone who truly lives the Gospel with deep conviction) that is worth a listen because it is a profound message about a great evil in our world: the mistreatment o...f women! Gentlemen, this is especially for you! https://www.ted.com//jimmy_carter_why_i_believe_the_mistre

LESS STUFF, MORE HAPPINESS! Here's an old, 5 minute TED talk that echoes what great spiritual leaders have taught for millennia: things do not bring happiness! So, as I clear out my garage of the tons of junk stored there for years, iI invite you to "edit" your life and focus not on the material, but on the people you love and the ideas you believe in: https://www.ted.com//graham_hill_less_stuff_more_happiness