Tamar Counseling Services

Here is a tangible tool you can use to help reduce stress on a neurophysiological level as we navigate holidays and Covid. Touchpoints provides light bilateral stimulation that you can wear anytime during the day, to help with focus (or help your kids focus with zoom school), or to help you sleep. These are similar to the tappers I have in my office for EMDR therapy, but these you can use at home. http://touchpoint.refr.cc/deborahvinall

#holidayselfcare #holidays2020 #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

Observe, notice, breathe. And be the change. You've got this. #trauma #traumarecovery #traumahealing #traumatherapist #traumatherapy #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

But when you are ready to feel it, you can heal it. Here's to all the cycle breakers and change makers. #trauma #traumarecovery #familydysfunction #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

This article presents an excellent explanation of EMDR therapy, the process, and the theory. It can be absolutely life-changing. https://www.psychiatryadvisor.com//emdr-a-rapidly-expand/

Too relatable? Therapists are standing by for your post-holiday needs! #thanksgiving #thanksgiving2020 #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

Letting go of what you can't control is an essential step toward inner peace, and often toward peace in relationships. There's so much these days we cannot control. Hold this truth in mind as we navigate these difficult days together. May it bring serenity. #surrender #anxiety #serenity #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

Holidays are a source of stress for many! Whether it's about facing toxic family members, disrespected boundaries, inability to see eye-to-eye on Covid celebration restrictions, trying to make a holiday special absent the usual people and traditions, or the sadness over what is lost this year, a stress survival guide feels appropriate right now! What is one thing from each category you can do to help you cope today? #stresssurvival #copingskills #copingtools #thanksgiving2020 #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

Sleep is essential to recovery from trauma. Substances that impair the quality of sleep may feel good to numb in the short term, but are likely to reinforce the traumatic effects. https://neurosciencenews.com/sleep-trauma-17210/

In addition to being a powerful coping tool for depression and anxiety, running makes your brain more adaptable to learn and retain new information.

A little sneak peak preview from Chapter 7 of my upcoming book. #selflove #selfcompassion #selfcare #gaslighting #gaslightingbook #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

And oh, the power when you do! #innerhealing #innerchildhealing #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

Keep going. Show the world what's inside. Don't let the haters get you down. And don't be a hater.

A gentle reminder today in support of self-love. To Beautiful YOU. #selflove #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

A Sunday reminder. Take care of you today.

A helpful article if you struggle with your child's meltdowns. In the end, it's all about connection.

Ever wish you had this feature available? Some days it would be nice to just turn it all off. But did you know that the most powerful way to release your emotions is actually to move right through them? With mindful, self-compassionate care, allow yourself to feel it all, then release it down stream. We're all carrying so much these days. The weight can be crushing. Notice the heaviness, then set it down, and rest. If the releasing just won't come, a skilled therapist can help.

A word for anxious pandemic listlessness: acedia. https://theconversation.com/acedia-the-lost-name-for-the-em

No matter what this day may trigger in you - pride, anxiety, shame - you matter! You are a beautiful part of our world, and I am glad you are here.

The power of self-talk: what you think impacts how you feel. Mindfully choosing to talk back to your anxious thoughts is not easy, but over time this discipline creates new neural pathways while the old anxious ones weaken. With enough repetition, changing your thoughts can change how you feel! #positiveselftalk #powerofpositivethinking #anxiety #therapistsofinstagram #uplandtherapy #psyd #lmft

This. Hits. Hard. The inability to receive support from others is a trauma response. Your I don’t need anyone, I’ll just do it all myself conditioning i...s a survival tactic. And you needed it to shield your heart from abuse, neglect, betrayal, and disappointment from those who could not or would not be there for you. From the parent who was absent and abandoned you by choice or the parent who was never home from working three jobs to feed and house you. From the lovers who offered sexual intimacy but never offered a safe haven that honored your heart. From the friendships and family who ALWAYS took more than they ever gave. From all the situations when someone told you we’re in this together or I got you then abandoned you, leaving you to pick up the pieces when shit got real, leaving you to handle your part and their part, too. From all the lies and all the betrayals. You learned along the way that you just couldn’t really trust people. Or that you could trust people, but only up to a certain point. Extreme-independence IS. A. TRUST. ISSUE. You learnt: if I don’t put myself in a situation where I rely on someone, I won’t have to be disappointed when they don’t show up for me, or when they drop the ball... because they will ALWAYS drop the ball EVENTUALLY right? You may even have been intentionally taught this protection strategy by generations of hurt ancestors who came before you. Extreme-independence is a preemptive strike against heartbreak. So, you don’t trust anyone. And you don’t trust yourself, either, to choose people. To trust is to hope, to trust is to be vulnerable. Never again, you vow. But no matter how you dress it up and display it proudly to make it seem like this level of independence is what you always wanted to be, in truth it’s your wounded, scarred, broken heart behind a protective brick wall. Impenetrable. Nothing gets in. No hurt gets in. But no love gets in either. Fortresses and armor are for those in battle, or who believe the battle is coming. It’s a trauma response. The good news is trauma that is acknowledged is trauma that can be healed. You are worthy of having support. You are worthy of having true partnership. You are worthy of love. You are worthy of having your heart held. You are worthy to be adored. You are worthy to be cherished. You are worthy to have someone say, You rest. I got this. And actually deliver on that promise. You are worthy to receive. You are worthy to receive. You are worthy. You don’t have to earn it. You don’t have to prove it. You don’t have to bargain for it. You don’t have to beg for it. You are worthy. Worthy. Simply because you exist. -Jamila White, @inspiredjamila