North County Rape Crisis & Child Protection Center

What were you wearing? Wednesday 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273

What were you wearing? Wednesday Every Wednesday we will be posting a 'What Were You Wearing' example of victim blaming. That question is the epitome of victim blaming and has nothing to do with sexual assault. Back in 2020 we were able to have an exhibit at Hancock College regarding these startling reminders that sexual assault has no rules. Perpetrators do not care about age, gender or what you are wearing.

Happy Birthday to the most caring, supportive, selfless, kindest boss. We love you and wish you a birthday full surprises and good energy.

While most of us will celebrate this long holiday weekend with putting out flags and planning a BBQ with friends and family, it also means more business for the traffickers and exploiters in our area. In this video, it depicts a young woman controlling an even younger teen. The reality is, they are both controlled by an exploiter / pimp. Thank you to A21 videos. ...

Healing Tuesday Many people believe you must forgive to move on and heal. Sometimes that creates anger within a survivor. Forgiveness begins with ourselves. Forgive yourself for blaming yourself for another's action. It was not your fault. 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-8535

Male Abuse Awareness Monday From 1 in 6 Myths & Realities About Manhood... Real Men Don’t Have These Experiences This myth is a powerful onethat males are never sexually used or dominated in ways that can leave them feeling vulnerable or overwhelmed. Thanks to this myth, guys tend to find themselves in one of these two situations: Suffering from negative effects, but not realizing what happened was harmful or that it’s related to current problems. Aware the experience(s) were harmful, but too ashamed to seek support dealing it. Both situations make it difficult for men to move on and achieve the lives they want and deserve. And both predicaments are made worse by widespread ignorance in society ignorance about the fact that such experiences are not rare for males, that the experiences can have lasting negative effects, and that men can overcome those effects and be manly at the same time. Breaking free from this myth can lower the odds of getting stuck with needless suffering and lost potential. 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273

Volunteer Friday! The next volunteer we would like to introduce is Ada Lopez. Ada has been a volunteer with North County Rape Crisis & Child Protection Center since July 2019. She felt like our organization is a crucial part of our community and wanted to contribute towards it. Helping people in need means the world to Ada and learning the ways in doing so has helped her grow. Ada feels it’s important to have someone available and ultimately finds it rewarding when she gets... off a hotline call, because she knows she’s helped someone towards recovery. When asked what message she would have for future volunteers, she said, Being able to volunteer for this organization made me more aware of what’s going on in our community. It’s a great organization to be a part of and I recommend everyone to volunteer. When people ask Ada why she got involved she lets them know it’s time well spent giving back and has learned so much in the process. Ada has volunteered in past tabling events and would volunteer again in future events. She enjoyed interacting with our community, informing them of our services and visiting different tabling services as well. Ada encourages everyone who has the time to volunteer, to jump in and be a be impact on our community. If you would like information regarding attending our volunteer training this fall, please contact Liz at: [email protected] or 805-922-2994

https://sbcountyrapecrisis.org/news/

We see them every day. If your church or service organization that you volunteer with would like a presentation on Human Trafficking or a review of all of the Center's services that we provide. please contact us. We are able to provide those presentations in person or via zoom. Contact the Lompoc office at 805-736-8535 and we will make sure to connect you to the correct person.

Healing Tuesday For at least 20 years we have known at the Center, that the time between Mother's Day and Father's Day can be a hard one. Not necessarily because someone has passed. But, because of the relationship pressure and expectations from society regarding these 'Holidays' to find the right card or send the flowers or post the most endearing post. Some people may have never spoken of the abuse or betrayal from a parent. They may still be maintaining that illusion of... a perfect family. Or, they may have set their boundaries and have no relationship with a parent or family. In groups and in individual sessions, survivors have spoken of their internal conflict. There are no easy or good answers on how to get through this time if you are one that deals with these internal conflicts. Breathe. You are doing what you are able to do in this complex relationship. Find a friend who understands. Or, find a chair by yourself looking at nature that gives you peace and just breathe. The universe understands, We understand. 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273

Statistics show that a high number of SA survivors who are identified as LGBTQIAA and or with a disability/multiple disabilities often face additional obstacles.... It is always best to support your peers who are neurodivergent (Brain differences), and LGBTQIAA. Let them know they are not alone! See more

Our Counselors continue providing support to agencies in the community of Santa Maria. One more week of healing, creativity and motivation with beautiful women from the SAFE House program.

What Were You Wearing? Wednesday. Resist victim blaming and assumptions. 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273

Healing Tuesday This. Breathe. 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273

Male Abuse Awareness Monday Just something to think about. 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273

We had the honor presenting at True Vine Bible Fellowship Church Lompoc on a topic so important, Human Trafficking. Please reach out if you are interested in a Human Trafficking presentation.

What a great article. If you have questions, here is a great start in answering them.

Building Resiliency Through Art class today with beautiful women.

Please share with any Veteran you may know in the area.

Hero? Angel? Advocate? Yes. And much, much more. We are so proud that one of our very own gets a little recognition of her dedication and compassion for her work to make things a bit better for the people she has graciously served across this country. We must also recognize Doreen Ross, Sabrina's mother and a volunteer with us for....well, forever? You, Sabrina and the rest of your family are the light of compassion that we need in our community. Thank you for being part of us.

Healing Tuesday Breathe. The sun will set and the sun will rise. Breathe.

Male Abuse Awareness Monday Aaron Stone A Sergeant Major in the U.S. Army and combat veteran, Aaron has transformed his childhood trauma into a mission to help fellow survivors.... A Sergeant Major and combat medic in the United States Army, Aaron has done three tours in Iraq and Afghanistan, and another mission in war-ravaged Bosnia. Yet he will tell you that none of those experiences affected him as much as the trauma he suffered at age 15, at the hands of a high school teacher who methodically groomed him and then raped him. And Aaron will also tell you that he chooses the word rape deliberately because it conveys the reality of what was done to him. Days after the rape, the teacher sent Aaron a letter, apologizing for an unnamed transgression. Aaron threw the letter into the trash. His mother found the letter and questioned Aaron about what had happened, but he denied that anything inappropriate had happened. Like virtually all abused children, he internalized the shame. The rape drove Aaron further into a private shell. It was a secret he kept from everyone. He graduated high school and went straight into the Army, trained as a medic, and climbed the ranks as an effective soldier. But the cost of keeping the secret caught up with Aaron in 2010. Thankfully, he sought help from the Army’s behavioral health program, and for the first time in his life he disclosed what had happened to him as a child. It was an act of liberation. Although nearly two decades had passed since the rape, Aaron decided to report the crime to the local police department. Days later he was stunned when the detective told him that the man who raped him was in jail. Aaron’s account had been corroborated by records at the local school board. Those records documented that, unbeknownst to Aaron, his mother had brought the teacher’s letter of apology to the school board, and the board had forced the teacher’s resignation. https://youtu.be/q202UJqvNd8

Folks...this woman right here...she’s a WARRIOR and we are honored she’s chosen us this year!

Healing Tuesday It can not be ignored how much additional stress every one feels this year. The Holiday's have their own level of stress, and this year - well, it's this year, can only add to our anxiety. However, the need to take care of ourselves first has not changed. What ever your traditions and what new traditions you will start, will only happen if you take care of you. Pay attention to your body and how it feels. Pay attention to your sleep and dreams. Pay atten...tion to your expectations of you. Breathe. We are here to listen. 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273

For our locals that follow us. Please share.

Male Abuse Awareness Monday From 1 in 6 "It is not your fault" It is the most powerful thing you can say to a survivor. ... 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273

Young teens - male and female - want to be older and feel needed or search out validation. This is a common scenario where a teen can find themselves overwhelmed and ashamed and decide all they can do is run away. Talk to your teen and make sure they understand that you will understand and help them in any situation. 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273... https://youtu.be/NzKLcvUQAqA

Wednesday's Wisdom Perpetrators have more success coming into your living room than stalking your child at Walmart. Perpetrators groom children in order to be trafficked, but there are perpetrators that you may call a friend or family member that will also groom your child online by playing games and having secret conversations with the child. They gain the child's trust and eventually manipulate them into situations where they are abused or tricked into running away with the perpetrator where they can be trafficked.

Healing Tuesday We refer to this behavior as the 3 'D's'. Denial, Disbelief and Discounting. You are immediately invalidated. You are told your experience, how you are feeling, and your perceptions are wrong or did not happen. When this happens a person shuts down. You start to doubt yourself and your feelings. We are here to talk anytime. Your feelings, and experiences are important. ... 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273

Thank you to the "The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and Netsmarz videos. 24 Hour Support Line: 805-736-7273 Report online Child Exploitation on the cyber tipline or call: ... 1-800-THE-LOST (1-800-843-5678) See more

Male Abuse Awareness Monday From 1 in 6 Website Expectations Men Face... Experiences of sexual abuse or assault can affect you to your core who you are, how you understand yourself as a man and a human being. Many men who’ve been sexually abused or assaulted fear their masculinity has been compromisedlike they’re not a real maneven if no one knows about what happened or thinks twice about their masculinity. Why? Having unwanted sexual experiences means being: Sexually used or dominated Vulnerable Overwhelmed Flooded by intense emotions These experiences and feelings run opposite to how males are commonly socialized and encouraged to be. Men’s confidence and self-esteem can greatly depend on how manly they feel, and how manly they believe other men and women see them as being.