Kaleidoscope Inside Counseling

#boundaries #codependency #stopwastingtime #toxicpeople #walkaway #emotionalvampires #letgowithlove #nostringsattached #youarelovableandworthwhile

Anger is not an experience that Did you know anger (and all the feelings under the anger area like resentful, annoyed, irritated, enraged, pissed etc) are not pure primary emotions but just SECONDARY emotions? Yep. Just a millisecond before anger you feel something else. Something undesireable. Something you don’t like. So you get angry!! It feels much more powerful than the feeling you didn’t like. Dealing with the UNDERLYING emotion is the key to reducing or removing unnec...essary anger from your life. Anger is hard in your own system and is like taking poison when you are upset with someone else. To avoid unnecessary anger, think about the underlying emotion. Was it a feeling of fear, powerlessness, being trapped, disrespected, grief, feeling left out, threatened or? What was it? If you can figure out what feelings were underneath, listen to them, express them process the experience & either accept or make changes accordingly. Feelings are informants. Listen to them. See more

We’re all physically isolated in the quarantine right now & my clients report to me everyday they feel emotionally isolated too as people in social media, people at stores & walking around getting exercise, the government & even well meaning friends are being judgmental & acting like they know it all about to cope w/ covid-19. It truly is distressing to learn about the specifics surrounding the covid-19 pandemic. It’s natural to have the part of your brain that tries to p...rotect you in survival mode put you in a fight or flight experience w/ adrenaline & cortisol flowing through your brain & body. The results of it happening to so many people @ the same time can be rough. However it is normal. It’s truly best to respect & understand that they’re struggling because of adjustment to full fledged global threat to life. It is appropriate. People adjust @ different rates. It may take weeks or months or even long after the pandemic high risk time is over. Shaming your peers who are doing their best by suggesting they are reacting too much or too little or not nice enough for you adds to unnecessary, rejecting & isolating rhetoric out there. I understand why it’s tempting to interject your perspective of the corona virus situations when others look like they are processing the experience too messy or too erratic for your comfort. If this is you, it may be a sign that the world becoming so unpredictable is a heavy weight for you to carry & it’s possible your method to manage it is to look at everyone else except yourself. It’s a good time to focus that energy to manage the life changes, isolation & health threat towards the smaller world that you do have control of which is so much! Journaling is powerful, talking to a mental health pro or fine tune your meditation & self care skills. Cuddle & care for loved ones more including your family at home w/ you or furry pets & plants. Coping by trying to control others is a codependent behavior that people uncomfortable w/ being present w/ their own feelings & thoughts can get stuck doing to relieve the discomfort of undesirable personal experience. The way to dissipate & heal is inward instead of outward. See more

I do think often about & still grin at the many exhilarating moments in life when I’ve come upon experience and realizations of my power as a woman. The ongoing thrill in life now, is figuring out just how I choose to wield that power today. Happy Women’s day to the women who are discovering & wielding their power. I’m proud of you. I’m grateful for you. I’m rooting for you! #internationalwomensday

Do you have an emotional support guinea pig? How about a goat or llama or chicken?! I get a few calls a month from people asking about emotional support animals! Most of them are reporting symptoms of anxiety and are looking for a letter to allow their animals to fly with them or live with them with no extra fee. If you have seen a news story about people flying with their chicken, you might feel skeptical and wonder if ESA’s or emotional support animals are truly effective ...treatments for Anxiety. The answer is, sometimes! I do write letters for people recommending they be allowed an emotional support animal. These people are my ongoing clients. Their symptoms from their mental health disorder like autistic spectrum disorder, generalized anxiety disorder or major depressive disorder are long term, ongoing and significantly reduce their ability to function on a day to day basis. However, it is important to know that not all my clients with these disorders qualify for my recommendation for an ESA. It s on a case by case basis. I do think most people benefit from having a pet. However, there is a difference between the benefits of having a pet and saying that a pet has a therapeutic effect on a psychiatric disorder like anxiety. Pet owners are found to be healthier on a number of psychological dimensions and measures of well-being, like self-esteem, and they were less lonely and introverted. But this does not necessarily mean that having a pet will significantly reduce serious anxiety or depression. I help each client create a multi-faceted plan that is specific to them! For example, working with me on reducing symptoms of anxiety could utilize a number of techniques such as: Anxiety reduction techniques (breathing, questioning problematic thoughts, positive self-talk, self-hypnosis). Stress reduction activities (meditation, music, getting in motion, gratitude perspective). Commitment to learning and using breathing, stress reduction or relaxation techniques daily. Identifying issues in your life that might be contributing to your anxiety and spending time figuring out how to address said issues. Take a hard look at your diet, sleep and exercise and working on needed adjustments. Become educated about whether supplements, over the counter medication or prescribed is appropriate to help you reduce anxiety. Kaleidoscope Inside Counseling provides psychotherapy and evidenced based information and education about relaxation, exercise, sleep, a good diet, reduction of environmental stressors. The relief you can get from utilizing these powerful little adjustments is awesome and often inspires further growth such as a happy healthy shift to a lifestyle and schedule that is a match for your nervous system! I hope you and your furry, fluffy, feathery or scaly friends have a wonderful week!! Remember to hel them stay cool in this warm summer weather. Warm Regards, Lynn Talmon LMFT 949-258-7737 See more