James K. Baker, MFT

Stressed out? Who isn't these days? Most of us could use a simple way to reduce stress during our busy day. Here’s a method that’s easy to learn and can fit into your hectic schedule. Deep breathing (diaphragmatic breathing) helps reduce adrenaline and cortisol, your body’s stress hormones, while balancing out your nervous system. Deep breathing has been shown to help lower blood pressure, improve mental focus and release serotonin to improve mood. It may also improve your... sleep quality. Ready to reduce stress? Follow these simple steps: 1) Sit in a comfortable position with your hand on your belly so you can feel your diaphragm as you breathe. 2) Breathe in slowly and deeply through your nose. 3) Hold the breath for a couple of seconds. 4) Slowly release the breath through your mouth. 5) Repeat the above steps for up to five minutes, but even one minute of deep breathing can be helpful. Deep breathing is a tool I use throughout the day to help myself feel calmer and more grounded. I hope you’ll give deep breathing a try next time you need a little stress reduction too! www.bakertherapy.com

Stressed out? Who isn't these days? Most of us could use a simple way to reduce stress during our busy day. Here’s a method that’s easy to learn and can fit into your hectic schedule. Deep breathing (diaphragmatic breathing) helps reduce adrenaline and cortisol, your body’s stress hormones, while balancing out your nervous system. Deep breathing has been shown to help lower blood pressure, improve mental focus and release serotonin to improve mood. It may also improve your... sleep quality. Ready to reduce stress? Follow these simple steps: 1) Sit in a comfortable position with your hand on your belly so you can feel your diaphragm as you breathe. 2) Breathe in slowly and deeply through your nose. 3) Hold the breath for a couple of seconds. 4) Slowly release the breath through your mouth. 5) Repeat the above steps for up to five minutes, but even one minute of deep breathing can be helpful. Deep breathing is a tool I use throughout the day to help myself feel calmer and more grounded. I hope you’ll give deep breathing a try next time you need a little stress reduction too! www.bakertherapy.com

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). Since the mid 1980'S EMDR has been found to be especially effective in reducing the distressing symptoms of trauma. EMDR can also help with anxiety, depression and low self-esteem. Visit my website for more: http://www.bakertherapy.com/emdr/

Changing the narrative of veterans. We are familiar with the stereotype of the traumatized soldier, but what if that's only part of a more complex story? Here's an interesting article about emerging recognition of post-traumatic growth.

Tips to De-Stress the Holidays While this season is often depicted as a time of boundless love, festivity, and plenty of good tidings, for many of us the reality of our experience is more varied. Impossibly high expectations coupled with the many pressures of the season and overindulgence on food and drink can contribute to feelings of sadness, depression, and anxiety. The good news is that you can make choices and take actions to reduce holiday stress and combat the holiday... blues. Here are some of tips to help you through. Get Real. Reset those expectations to be more realistic. It can be helpful to remember that the holidays won’t magically erase feelings of loneliness, sadness, and other uncomfortable feelings. Try to let go of that expectation and prepare to work towards easing these difficult feelings (see below). Remember that the holidays will never be the same as they were when you were a child. You and your family are not the same people you were then. This is especially important to remember if your memories of the holidays bring up pain. As an adult you now have the power to change your experience of the holidays to build new, positive memories. It's never too late to start doing so. Create Joy. There are concrete things you can do to support the feelings often associated with the holidays: connection, gratitude, happiness. Cut back on the alcohol because it’s a depressant. Eat in moderation. Your body will thank you but so will your mental health because less weight gain equals less guilt, anxiety, and higher self-esteem. Volunteer to help the underprivileged and experience the warmth of giving and ease feelings of loneliness. Prioritize your time and don’t overbook yourself. Remember: it’s OK to say no sometimes. Take time out from the hubbub to recharge and do something that you enjoy, just for you. Finally, build up your gratitude muscle. Spend a few moments each morning identifying a few things you have to be grateful for. This is one of the best tools we have to shift our mood to feeling more positive about our situation, whatever it might be. The holiday season can be challenging and there are things you can do to help yourself emotionally, but if you still find yourself having a hard time you may need to reach out for help. Consider the support systems you may already have in place such as loving family members or friends, or your spiritual community. If you need additional support consider reaching out to a therapist. Do what you can to help yourself but remember, you don’t have to go it alone. www.bakertherapy.com

There are actions we can take to support ourselves through times of uncertainty.

Sometimes parents depend on their children rather than another adult for emotional support. This can lead to relational problems, difficulty setting appropriate boundaries, and feelings of guilt as he or she transitions into adulthood.

Dr. Gottman's extensive research on married couples has revealed the secrets to a happy relationship.

"We start stuffing our feelings, emotions, and our pain in the spiritual basement of our own souls, because we learned that it’s not OK to be ourselves, or to show our feelings, emotions, fears, and pain." https://goodmenproject.com//man-get-old-school-damaging-u/

September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month. If you or someone you know is in an emergency, call The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or call 911 immediately.

Sometimes it's easy to forget that we do have a choice.

Do you ever fear being "found out", exposed as a fraud despite objective evidence of your capabilities? Many of us secretly struggle with "imposter syndrome", that feeling that we don't quite measure up to those around us. https://youtu.be/eqhUHyVpAwE

"As individuals, we benefit greatly from learning skills to manage our emotions, cope with our inner critics and become assertive. The same is true for couples: Our romantic relationships also benefit greatly when we take the time to learn and practice the skills that cultivate connection." http://psychcentral.com//3-skills-taught-in-couples-thera/