Deborah Kim LMFT

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBVtX_JlAOL/

https://www.ted.com//liz_kleinrock_how_to_teach_kids_to_ta

https://medium.com//talking-to-children-after-racial-incid

Encountering racist comments and attitudes with the people we are closest too often presents a challenge with how to call them out. You may notice you freeze or feel confused about how to still hold love and respect while doing the work of anti racism-but you can do both. https://www.instagram.com/p/CA3dqs-g6lt/?igshid=15i95bynz8cb

This is a great exercise whether you are a parent or not. It helps one get started about one’s influences and origins of racialized identities. https://www.instagram.com/p/CA2vgj7hqng/?igshid=rrwnz1tak1ag

Learn more about the history of the fastest-growing ethnic group in America. Tune in or stream the premiere of "Asian Americans" tonight at 8/7c! #AsianAmPBS

Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day. - Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

There was a rhythm I got into with cancer that has served me well right now. Every day sort of has an arc to it. There’s a limited amount that you’re going to be able to face as you stare into the abyss. Being able over the course of the day to track your own resources will help you know how to spend them. There’s just a minute where you know, OK, I’m starting to hit the wall. Time to turn the boat around. There’s only so much we can do, and in the face of unlimited need we... have to not just wildly oscillate between sort of intense action and then narcolepsy.... ...What’s most important, at least in my little routine, is you pick a time and then you call it. So like 7 p.m., no more new information. No more starting sentences with, Did you hear about the. And then start this sort of gentleness... ...If the days are really full and heavy, to focus on the absurdity is so great. Small delight is really fun... ...The trick is to find meaning without being taught a lesson. A pandemic is not a judgment, and it will not discriminate between the deserving and the undeserving... https://www.nytimes.com//kate-bowler-cancer-coronavirus.ht

Give yourself permission to have strong feelings of chaos and loss of control AND make room for a moment of peace and control like holding a cup of tea in your hands.

1. Engage in calmness and grounding A. Take 3 breaths with a longer exhale B. Find your inner moxy and strength C. Imagine the people that care about you, including your therapist or pets!... 2. Tend and Befriend by holding compassion for others, even strangers so you feel connected to the greater world. Resist seeing others as enemies.

[Intersectionality] was coined in 1989 by professor Kimberlé Crenshaw to describe how race, class, gender, and other individual characteristics intersect with one another and overlap. ....that individuals have individual identities that intersect in ways that impact how they are viewed, understood, and treated. Black women are both black and women, but because they are black women, they endure specific forms of discrimination that black men, or white women, might not. ...Rather, she said, the point of intersectionality is to make room for more advocacy and remedial practices to create a more egalitarian system. https://www.vox.com//intersectionality-conservatism-law-ra

http://www.equalityinstitute.org/blog/2020/2/26/iwd-2020 Adopting an intersectional lens is vital when we talk about gender equality because not all women or gender diverse people experience the world in the same way. In order to truly tackle gender inequality, we have to acknowledge, examine and tackle other forms of discrimination and oppression - such as racism and ableism, amongst many others.

Racism expands beyond skin color it’s assumptions and discrimination against individuals and groups of people, based on racial identity. This includes not just skin color, but also cultural norms and behavior, language, and other markers of racial and ethnic identity. White supremacy is assuming that racism would be over if people of color just assimilated and acted more like white people, that assimilation is even a goal for people of color, and that non-white culture is deviant or inferior to whiteness. http://booksforlittles.com/racial-diversity/