Dr. Shirley Pakdaman, Psychologist

Dear Millennials, Let go of your regrets. Embrace your wisdom. Make the moves you know are right.

Race-based traumatic stress is real. Black lives (and minds) absolutely do matter. Acknowledging and labeling this stress and breaking the pattern of not caring for self, whether that is because of cultural beliefs that caring for others is more important, or that self-care is indulgent, is the first step in healing and thriving and fighting the lie that black lives are not as precious as any other life.

Disappointment and uncertainty are inevitable. But we don’t have to turn them into suffering! The Atlantic's new "How To Build A Life" column outlined negative cognitive errors we make, like confusing disappointment with regret, that exacerbate feelings of frustration and exhaustion. Learn some therapist techniques to try on yourself here!

Renowned psychotherapist and author Esther Perel spoke with the New Yorker about relationships under quarantine, addressing topics like the importance of alone time and tools for effective conflict resolution.

The New York Times published a guide to creating screen-life balance when our lives depend on digital communication, offering recommendations like monitoring moods before, during, and after screen use and recognizing stress-scrolling.

Skin hunger can manifest through a range of symptoms, including depression, anxiety, and sleep disorders. For people living alone right now, exploring qualities of touch by massaging a shoulder or playing with textures on skin can offer some benefits.

Many teens and young adults are grappling with the loss of milestones like prom and graduation. NPR outlined ways that parents can support children in processing these losses including how to see these losses as part of a greater good.

Los Angeles County Department of mental health is offering free access to the Headspace app for all LA county residents through the end of the year!

We are in uncharted territory in every area of life, including how we respond to death. Our rituals around mourning and death are greatly communal experiences, but not being able to grieve the normal way should not be a reason to fall into unhealthy coping or extended denial. Reach out to someone who has lost a dear one, be creative about how you can spend time with them while apart. If you are mourning yourself, please remember, it is ok to experience waves of emotion, and create your own rituals to remember a loved one.

Having difficulty working from home? Here are some tools to set yourself up for success.

"As COVID-19, the disease caused by the new coronavirus, has spread around the globe, many people have found themselves struggling to cope, regardless of their mental health histories. And to be clear, many if not most depression and anxiety patients have seen their symptoms worsen. But a fraction have, paradoxically, actually felt their symptoms alleviate."

Many people are reporting lighter sleep and more vivid dreams. If you're experiencing this, you're not alone. Fortunately, there are a few things you can do to set yourself up for better sleep.

Since the COVID-19 outbreak in California, I have transitioned temporarily to a 100% telehealth practice. If you need support through the anxiety and stress of this situation, please know that telehealth is a good option. I see clients on secure video. For most clients, the transition to telehealth was pretty easy. For a confidential and complimentary phone consultation, send me an email though my website www.BHTherapist.com

By standing up to your inner critic in a gentle and loving way (or in a strong and powerful way!), you’ll begin to improve the quality of your most important relationship: your relationship with yourself.

A true sense of self and recognizing what is authentic means getting clear about the actions and behaviors that are consistent with our most deeply held values. It isn’t always easy. Recognizing that it’s difficult to be genuine all the time, and that we don’t have to reveal everything in all situations, is part of building authenticity. Think of it as a process, not an outcome; an ongoing value lived, not a goal attained. Speaking our inner truth takes courage. And it is well worth it. Read on for some good illustrations...

If you have the freedom to wake up when you like, then things are different, but if that extra Netflix episode is forcing you to cut your sleep short, then you should try to do something about it. Good advice for having more energy and creativity throughout the day.